New store to be ‘absolutely unlike anything’

New Yorker plans unusual Pearl St. venue

By Mio Moser | Manor Ink

Livingston Manor, NY – Among the many new stores set to open in Livingston Manor, one stands out in particular: Kevin’s Emporium.

The store will be owned by an eccentric businessman from New York City, Kevin G. Roberts. Manor Ink was able to meet with Roberts, who spoke about his new store’s location, items, prices and its impact on the community.

Kevin Gerald Roberts, born on Oct. 18, 1987, has always dreamt of starting his own business. “It was my greatest aspiration to start a new and individual company,” Roberts said. He chose the location of Livingston Manor because he preferred the peaceful, quaint atmosphere of the hamlet over that of his hometown. Construction of his store, which will occupy a plot of land on Pearl Street, will begin after the New Year.

“I wanted the store to be absolutely unlike anything else in this town. This strong decision is to be reflected in the items I sell,” Roberts declared. While nothing has been finalized yet, it is indeed true that the new store’s items will be a novelty to the region. Moreover, items will likely change frequently over time, but several products have already been confirmed.

Among those items are popped party balloons, as the owner strongly believes in recycling. The Emporium will also carry random keys in a bucket, broken crayons, single earrings, antique soda cans, and, perhaps strangest of all, empty perfume jars. “I have been criticized for my choice of items, but I am confident in the store’s long-term strength and ability to dominate the market,” Roberts said.

To start strong with his new store, Roberts will hold a 15-percent-off sale on all his wares. While nobody is quite sure about the general price range of the store’s merchandise, previous estimates expect relatively high prices. The owner, however, disagrees. He states that every effort was made to keep prices low.

Upon further investigation, it was learned that the lowest intended price for any item was to be kept at $1,000. When asked about this, Roberts confessed that he did intend to sell his products at this value. However, he then decided to sink his prices to a minimum value of $700. “I’ve done everyone a huge favor, as I’ve once again brought down prices. Everyone should be massively grateful,” Roberts said.

“Since I am expecting huge customer waves after opening, I will be implementing several new changes to the surrounding environment,” Roberts said. “First, there will be a large parking lot behind the facility where that little fishing stream is now. Second, there will be a waitlist that determines who gets into the store first. Third, once you shop in my store, you will be forbidden to enter any other store within 50 miles. My security will be enforcing this,” he said.

Whether or not this store will become reality in its currently planned form, can only be told by time. Until then, we will have to await the grand opening of Kevin’s Emporium.

Editor: Just before going to press, Manor Ink learned that Mr. Roberts has abandoned his plans to build a store in Livingston Manor and will instead open ByteWash, a facility for laundering crypto currency, in Dubai.